I have been reading Maggie’s blog

for a long time, and I just think she’s swell. Mighty Goods deserves all the acclaim it gets, as does the girl herself. However, lately I just get depressed when I read her. Her life is so mega-fabulous I just get sad. She just had a  (crazy cute) baby, and yet she’s traipsing off to Amsterdam and bachelorette parties in Las Vegas. When I first had a baby, I didn’t even get to sleep in the bed- or at all, in fact.

I don’t begrudge her her awesomeness, I just wish there was some awesomeness for me, too. Friends who Ro Sham Bo during wedding vows? That’s just extravagant fabulousness.

This is what is just so exciting in my life right now, and I am truly and wholeheartedly thrilled: Friday Audrey goes to school from 8:30 to 4:30, and the Big Kids left this morning. Meaning, for a whole day, I have no real responsibilities. This has not happened to me since the Girl was born. Since the Girl was born, I have not sat in a cafe and read a book and drank the World’s Largest Chai Ever. Which is exactly what I am going to do. Then I will go to Marshalls and return a $25 item that doesn’t fit, thereby giving me a $25 credit at Marshalls. This is what passes for thrills in my life. Not Amster-damn-dam. *sigh*

Sometimes she calls Pete “sweetie”. But she’s a baby, so it’s more like “fweetie”, which adds to the cuteness tremendously. She typically calls him that when she is asking for something, like I do. Sometimes she will say it to me, like, “Ask fweetie to get my fwashwight.” Fucking funny, I tell you. She never calls me sweetie though, and she never calls Pete “Pete”. I get a “Traci” every once in a while, though, especially if we are around other people calling me Traci. I wonder why, in that bizarre little growing network of neurons that is her brain, that this should be. Man I wish I had become a neuropsychologist. Stupid art degree.

I have proof that I don’t just sit around not blogging. I am a crafty, crafty girl, which has been documented thoroughly by my fabulous neighbor, Katy.

The colors, man, look at the colors! 

Perhaps some day I will have enough free time to do more than post random clips from my day, but for now, here’s one from a few minutes ago, said in my most Modern Mom empathetic acknowledgment voice:

“Hey there! I’ll bet that sticking both feet into a plate of ketchup feels pretty interesting, doesn’t it?”

From the bathtub, while I read a book:

“Look! I can make bubbles with my bum!”

Sticking a be-Crok’d toe into a double wide trailer-sized pile of mulch in the driveway:

“Mama, is this poop?”